Jim McMahon He Will, McMahon He Won’t

Jim McMahon was one of the more creative characters of all time in the NFL. Which is quite an achievement. Like historical content on the NFL? This is definitely the article for you! Check out my other articles on the NFL of yesteryear here.

Who In The McMahon is that?

I’ve encountered Jim McMahon in much of my prior research. He played through a lacerated kidney and had an undiagnosed broken neck through (most/all) his career. Most importantly, he was also in the Super Bowl Shuffle. Despite all that, it was surprising to see that he had so many more eventful stories in his life.

But Jim McMahon was more than a medical marvel and a wild-story factory. He was also a player in the NFL. Not just any player either. He was a two-time Super Bowl champ, a pro bowler, and one of the 100 greatest Bears of all time.

The quarterback is best known for his career with the Chicago Bears from 1982 to 1988. Fewer fans know he played for six other franchises from 1989 to 1996. Ryan Fitzpatrick before Fitz magic. McMahon was also a San Diego Charger, Philadelphia Eagle, Minnesota Viking, Arizona Cardinal, Cleveland Brown, and Green Bay Packer.

Even fewer fans know about Little Jim McMahon’s story. The future QB was born a Jersey City boy and was raised Catholic by his parents, Jim Sr. and Roberta. At three years old, McMahon left New Jersey behind for San Diego. Growing up in California, little Jim was known best for his athletic prowess in every sport he played. This is despite his severed cornea due to a childhood accident.

At age six, Jim McMahon attempted to untie a knot in his toy gun’s holster with a fork. His eye ended up eating the fork. He could still see out of his right eye, but he had extreme sensitivity to light, which is why he is perpetually wearing sunglasses. He was also one of the first NFL players to have a tinted visor on his helmet.

In the middle of high school, Jim McMahon moved with his family to Roy, Utah, and played football there as well.

Leaving Utah was not in the cards for Jim. He played at BYU for his entire collegiate career. When not struggling with injuries, McMahon was nearly always the starter. The quarterback was no slacker; Jim McMahon set 70 NCAA records and was inducted into the BYU Athletic Hall of Fame.

Jim McMahon Goes Pro

McMahon was thrilled to move on from BYU to the Bears. Chicago? Not so much. He pissed off head coach Mike Ditka and owner George Halas by showing up to his first public function for the team with a beer in hand. The drink was quickly chased by Bloody Mary’s.

It was probably a good thing that Jim was so good; Ditka kept him around for many seasons despite the two constantly getting after each other. The QB, after all, finished the night wasted after drinking several pitchers of beer. Allegedly, he could only get outdrank by the player known as The Fridge.

Jim McMahon would deal with small injuries throughout his NFL career as well, which stymied some of his success. Despite his strong performances, the Chicago Bears did move on due to his injuries and his disagreements with the president of the Bears and his head coach.

This would be a theme for Jim. He also didn’t get along with the San Diego head coach and basically everyone else. Some would say McMahon was an acquired taste, personality-wise.

Things were never as hot career-wise for Jim McMahon as when he was a member of the Chicago Bears. He spent the majority of his career after leaving Chicago as a backup and third-string QB.

Jim McMahon Gets Personal

This man has never had an uneventful moment in his life. In 2003, the bad boy former QB would get a DUI, and in 2012, McMahon possibly got into some legal hot water in a financial situation involving the FDIC.

Besides finding out he had a broken neck, Jim was also diagnosed with early-onset dementia at just 53 years old, 13 years ago. He actually considered ending his own life in 2014 due to the headaches and dementia. Thankfully, he did not resort to that. His strength brings much-needed awareness to the topic.

McMahon supports legalized schmeed and has advocated for the legalization of green stuff. Allegedly, using the schmeed medically has ended his 100 Percocet’s a month addiction due to arthritis and other chronic pain.

The Chicago Bears should bear some responsibility for that pain. After all, they had him playing six games without a labrum. His shoulder would dislocate every time he threw the ball. What did the Bears do? Give him the juice (learn about Toradol abuse in the NFL here). Did Jim not care about his body, or did football not allow him to succeed and care about his body at the same time?

Jim McMahon was not just in the limelight on the big screen on Sunday Night Football and the music video for the Super Bowl Shuffle. He was also on the show The League, as well as inspiring a movie based on his life story. His visiting troops on tour in Iraq in 2006 also put him in the news for all the right reasons.

You may not know that Jim McMahon was once a married man. He married Nancy Daines in 1982, and the couple divorced in 2009 after having four children.

In an attempt to not lose his foot in 2022 so he wouldn’t miss a golf tournament, McMahon avoided the amputation option when he had a post-surgery infection in his foot after a routine bone spur procedure. It was a dangerous choice, but Jim pulled it off.

 

Wild Stories Of Jim In The Wild

The former Chicago Bears great has so many hilarious stories. I will try to capture all the best ones, but let me know down below in the comment section if I missed any Jim McMahon gems.

A Little Mooning Goes A Long Way

Concussion awareness used to not be what it is. McMahon was known for Russell Wilson-styled baseball slides—except for leading with his helmet. When he was advised by the coaching staff to lead with his feet to protect his body (not his head), Jim got a helmet to the buttocks, causing a deep and painful bruise in his buttocks. When the media asked him about it, he mooned them all to show them how things were healing. Don’t ask questions you don’t want the answer to.

McMahon Angers New Orleans

A rumor was started (that was confirmed false) that Jim McMahon claimed all New Orleans women are slugs (exchange the g with a t). With the energy only New Orleans can bring, Jim faced death threats over his supposed statement. He had to wear a different number on his uniform so he didn’t get wacked before he could play in the Super Bowl.

Beary Rude

When the Green Bay Packers got to visit the president after the Super Bowl win in 1996, McMahon showed up in his Chicago Bears jersey. He ruffled feathers all around, even though he claimed he did so because he couldn’t go when he won the Super Bowl as a Bear in 1985 due to the explosion of the shuttle, the Challenger.

Take that, Rozelle!

Rozelle fined Jim McMahon for wearing a headband that had an Adidas logo on it. The next week, Jim got a headband with Rozelle written on it. He didn’t get the fine waived, but he did get a laugh out of the commissioner.

McMahon did use his headband for good, using it to bring awareness to childhood diabetes after he put the Rozelle one back in the closet.

Jesus Wept

If you were wondering how bad McMahon and Ditka’s relationship was, this little exchange from 1985 clears that up. Ditka was angry when McMahon changed a play suddenly. The head coach called Jim a c**t and a mother f**ker. In response, the QB said f**k you. Not as creative, but the point was made.

McMahon would refer to Ditka as Sybil, the woman who was portrayed in the 1976 film with multiple personality disorder.

On The Job Drunk

There was never a night out that Jim didn’t love. A teammate recalls that back in 1986, after a strong performance, Jim looked awful post-game and admitted he had been up all the previous night gambling.

Another night during training camp, he drank himself under the table and claimed he would forego camp the following morning. Not wanting to face the ire of Ditka, his teammates weren’t having it. They got into his dorm room and dumped ice water buckets over the sleeping QB, who showed up to practice, albeit pale.

It’s amazing Jim didn’t get into more bar fights. He didn’t like people talking mess about him and his team one night out, so he threw an raw egg onto their table and watched it splatter. Don’t do that in New Orleans, bud.

Just kidding… McMahon pelted people with fruit in the French Quarter with former QB Jim Kelly from the future Buffalo Bills’ balcony.

Who Needs Clothes?

Jim McMahon dreamed of a day when he could buy his own golf course so he could be naked besides wearing a golf glove. Instead, he settled on golfing without shirts and shoes at fancy country clubs.

Fashion was Jim’s thing. He made his own mohawk hairstyle and rocked an earring before it was particularly common for men. Fatigues and cigars were a go-to ensemble too.

McMahon was known to wear brightly colored thongs. Just thongs. While mowing his lawn and while getting acupuncture on his bruised backside with media present. Did I mention where he had the acupuncturist sent from? Japan. This man is extra.

Pearls = Clutched

In 1984, Jim McMahon showed up to a Halloween party dressed as a priest with a “holy book” full of naked women. Amen.

Keeping up the priest theme was important to Jim. Ditka required men to travel to away games wearing a collar. The QB interpreted this as wearing a priest’s collar.

It is important to mention that as wild McMahon was out on the streets, he was not a womanizer, and being unfaithful to his college girlfriend was not his style. There’s something sweet about that.

Mad Mac said it best with this quote:

“People don’t like hearing (other) people saying what they wished they would have said, but they don’t have the balls to do it! A lot of the things I did just for the hell of it, and that’s what I tried to show my team-mates, that it doesn’t matter what you do off the field during the week, it matters what you do on the field on Sunday. I’m not going to lose sleep over someone thinking I am an idiot!”

That’s an attitude we can all get behind.

We need people like Jim McMahon. They keep us honest and on our toes. It takes all kinds in the NFL.